Today, many people find themselves in the position of raising step children when they marry partners who already have kids and therefore find that they are in need of parenting advice. This time can be especially trying when teenage stepchildren are involved. Of course, you will be faced with different stumbling blocks as a stepparent than you would normally have to address just as a newlywed. While this kind of family unit is not new, it is much less out of the ordinary than it was before. In this article, we’ll be discussing some helpful guidelines for building a great relationship with your stepchildren.
While Raising Step Children Establish Open Communication
The first thing you should establish when raising step children in some form of open communication, such as family meetings that occur where all of you can have a chance to speak. Everyone should understand that by meeting together, issues can be discussed which might otherwise get out of hand if they are not worked out. The position of a step parent can be extremely difficult and draining, particularly if you have never done this before.
A positive step forward, especially when trying to build this new relationship on solid ground, is to tell your step children that you are willing to talk with them about anything. A necessary component of this new relationship is the support of your spouse in regard to open dialogue and your new position in the family. By doing this, everything will be out in the open and any issues can be discussed and dealt with expediently.
Spend Quality Time Together With Step-kids
Another thing that you should do to help your stepchildren relate to you better is to plan separate blocks of time you can spend alone with each child. This should be the case no matter what the mix of kids is in your new family – your kids and/or your step-kids. Each child has his or her own interests, needs and problems and you have to make time to learn about these.
When raising step children, you can’t make a better move to be accepted by your stepchildren than to actively and sincerely become involved in some kind of activity enjoy. It doesn’t matter if it’s a chess competition or a ballet recital. Be there. Or if they have a problem in some area, such as a certain subject in school, maybe you can help them out. Your collection of “kids” is made up of individual little people. Each one is distinct. This is something you must not overlook.
Back Up Your Partner
Your new husband or wife must be your primary focus, regardless of whether or not the step kids you’re helping raise ever come around. Your best bet as the new step parent is to play a secondary role, especially until the children have gotten used to you. Time may be your largest ally as you awake the step children to accept you in their lives and as a parental figure to them.
Most of the time, it is best to do whatever you can to help your partner in basic decisions related to family matters. Consider in your mind that all of you are having to adjust to this new situation and it will take a little bit of time. As a step father or step mother, you will slowly learn to adjust and modify your parenting skills day by day.
Use the tips and strategies that we have provided to help you out in your new role of raising step children, implementing them with your new role in the family. Soon, after much trial and error, and once your relationship has become more solid, the stepchildren may inevitably find that you’re not so bad. Hey they may even turn to you for guidance and support.